Fashion news

Attendance figures from the Somerset Fashion Week showed that you are just as dedicated to following the latest fashion trends as the farmer's wife, so we are happy to report that at long last all the major chainstores are now listening to what pigs really want and are even starting to employ pigs in their design studios.

Hosiery?
Who says support tights are for old ladies? We've all had days when we've suffered with tired, aching legs, so you could do worse than look at the Porky's Lite Legs range of hosiery. Available in a range of different deniers, including super sexy ultra sheer.

Try this for a laugh
Take a stroll in the park in a crisp white blouse matched with a pair of sporty culottes. Just watch the faces of the passing teenagers.

Pile on the pounds
Pile on the pounds and look cleverly coordinated in an instant by wearing shorts and T-shirt in a matching hooped pattern. Avoid vertical stripes at all costs.

Cool and casual
Not quite ready for those skimpy shorts you often see on TV? Well, when you want to feel relaxed and casual but still want to hide from the farmer, you'll find camouflage shorts from your local Army Surplus store are a lot more flattering to your figure.

Smarty pants
Much to the relief of pigs everywhere, wide legged trousers are simply this seasons must have item. Our advice is to team them up with a floral waistcoat.

High plains drifter
A king size poncho is fun to wear and offers an extremely practical way of getting past a nightclub doorman.

Belt up
Belts are a very important fashion accessory and can do wonders for almost any outfit. Remember to pull the belt tightly at the waist to show off your magnificent hips to their best advantage.