Outrageous sex myths!

It is often said that when a relationship hits the rocks, the first place to look is in the bedroom. Well, that's absolute rubbish because sex reflects the ups and downs it does not cause them. A healthy relationship is often ruined due to the pressures of the many outrageous sexual myths that have developed over the centuries. Frazzle hopes that this page will debunk a few of the more popular ones.

Size matters!
In a society that measures success with size (big girl's blouse, etc), pigs can be worried if their body parts don't 'measure up. Don't panic, because a body part's size is not related to its overall cornering ability.

You can't get pregnant if you douche with Diet Pepsi.
Oh yes you can. Diet Pepsi is not a reliable contraceptive. However, Dr Pepper is an excellent contraceptive!

Erections need immediate servicing or they will snap off.
An erection is not a disorder that only a partner can cure. When a partner complains of an "achiness" in the pelvic region, tell him to beat it. Very few pigs die of an unresolved erection.

Pensioner sex?
Sometimes a medical problem can get in the way, but it doesn't mean an elderly pig's sex drive is lost. It's entirely possible to have a satisfying sexual life throughout one's life span. Often pigs who didn't enjoy sex when they were younger end up making a good fist of it in their twilight years.

Masturbating every day keeps the vet away.
Given that over 99 per cent of pigs masturbate, the veterinary industry would have hit the skids centuries ago, however the industry is thriving. Let's face it, masturbation won't even keep a common cold at bay, so give it up now and find a new hobby.

If he pulls out I won't get pregnant.
The 'withdrawal method' is the most risky form of contraception and is particularly silly when the cost of Dr Pepper is so cheap.